Wednesday, December 29, 2010

I'm a girl and I can sulk if I want to

 Apparantly when we come up against conflict, the human instinct is fight or flight. I'm not so sure if this is God's instinct which is more likely to involve such things as Grace, compassion and forgiveness. Since I'm "me" however, I can choose to do one of the former, and since I'm a woman, I can do both. So when Beloved innocently pushes the wrong buttons - I say "innocently" because he is just a man who hasn't fully worked out how complex the female mind actually is - it's perfectly logical to offer a piece of my mind before hitting the metal in the van and screeching up the street at a full 40 kms/ph (hey, just because I'm moody doesn't make me a law breaker).  I'm getting quite clever now because in the early days of our marriage I used to take off on foot, sometimes in barefeet and often without my handbag. I'm older and wiser now and take transport and a cardi.

I found myself hooning up the road the other evening. What normally takes place during one of my drives shall remain my secret because I'm mysterious and enigmatic. On this occasion though, I noticed that the sun was setting so I headed for the beach to watch. I sat at the waterfront feeling sorry for myself and told God that while I appreciate His cool artistic talents in making a pretty sunset, I wasn't listening and was going to put my ipod in my ears, so there!

Some how All American Reject's "Hope It Gives You Hell" wasn't lifting my mood so I flicked forward and came across Evie. And it wasn't even downloaded illegally from the internet (as if I would!). About a year ago the lovely Evie Karlsson mailed me a couple of her CDs herself in response to the fan page I set up on Facebook. So Evie came through with one of my favourite songs.  I think God wanted me to hear this:

He never said you'd only see sunshine.
He never said there'd be no rain.
He only promised us a heart full of singing.
At the very thing that once caused pain.

Give them all...
Give them all...
Give them all to Jesus
Shattered dreams, wounded hearts, broken toys.
Give then all...
Give them all...
Give them all to Jesus
And He will turn your sorrow into joy.

Errrm, thanks Lord. Nice sunset by the way :-)

Saturday, December 11, 2010

Never do today what you can put off till tomorrow

Errrrmmm....Church Christmas Production is on the 19th December. I'm on the "team" that is producing said of the of the writers.  Ummm...Lord is it okay that my bits aren't exactly fully written yet? After all, I still have eight days until show time.

It's not that I'm putting things off. I'm simply planning my schedule.  I wonder if procrastination is a sin. I should imagine it is, since it's something I do so well. I just read in Proverbs that "the hand of the diligent shall rule, while the slothful will be put to forced labour." Hmmm....You rule R, Siborg and Kez (the other team members who are far better organised than me)! And this clearly explains why I am put to forced labour cleaning toilets, doing washing and cleaning up cat poo on a daily basis.  For this reason, I WILL get the 70s and 90s scenes written TODAY! Or maybe tomorrow.

But I DO have the costumes organised! I got onto that pretty quickly.  Last year's production was planned entirely around my top notch Santa suit. Praise the Lord for Santa.

There is one thing I'm glad I didn't put off in my life. When Jesus was knocking on the door of my heart, I just let Him in. Mind you, 36 years later (don't do the Maths!) I still haven't exactly tidied up in there and cleared a space for Him to sit on the couch without wondering what that squelchy thing is that He just sat on. I really should get around to it instead of just leaving it for Him to clean up.

As for the production, "it'll be all right on the night" (or in this case, morning). Not knowing exactly what I'm doing and yet somehow it all comes together year after year once everyone else knows what they're doing - it's exhilerating! Meanwhile, has anyone noticed that I turned my laptop on about an hour ago to get started on tweaking my script? I haven't actually looked at that this morning because I got sidetracked looking at procrastination cartoons and then decided to share some of them here. 

This is what it's like living inside my life. I live on the edge of risk-taking and danger - or I would if I could be bothered getting out of bed on a Saturday morning. It's how I roll...