A word in God's ear

I suck at reading the Bible. There, I said it. I suck at reading the Word of God and I suck at praying. Other Christians talk about their morning "quiet time" and I'm in awe of them. My quiet time is either spent in the bathroom or updating my status on Facebook. Oh Lord have mercy on me for I am the biggest sinner of them all.

Hold up...that was a prayer. Booyah! 9:47am on a Friday morning and I've already had loads of conversations with my most Majestical Bestie. I said goodmorning to him when I woke up. I asked him to be with my husband when he testifies in a court case today. I thanked him for the cute little "I love you" card C made for me yesterday. I asked Him to help me not to be too much of a dufus today. Heck, I've been bending God's ears all morning.

Reading the Bible is a trickier challenge because so many irrelevant things crop up. Obviously it's because I'm such a threat in the spiritual realm that ol' Hairy Legs can't stand the thought of me getting ready for battle. Too bad he forgot that I use my favourite scripture as my password for my work applications and my next favourite on my Trade Me account.  Too bad he forgot that I have the "Daily Scripture Application" on Facebook.  Too bad that he forgot that I have my Bible beside my bed and I open it pretty much...most...not every single...day.

I think Hairy Legs has been trying to guilt me out by telling me that I'm not really reading the Word.  The idea gets into my head that I'm cheating because I keep dipping into Proverbs.  I like the Proverbs - short and to the point.  Then I get the thought that I'm just looking for the interesting bits by flicking around for the juicy stories such as the left-handed Ehud killing the super-fat Eglon in the loo; or Elisha being mocked by a group of hoodrats for being follically challenged. Can I help it if bits of the Bible are interesting?

In your face Hairy Legs. I'm not perfect and I know it. God knows it too and He likes me just the way I am.  I think I'd rather let Him take care of making the changes in my life, not you thank you very much Mr HL.