I was having a conversation with someone about the word "maudlin" the other day. Despite achieving School Certificate English in 1978, it was a new word to me. It turns out that my friend had been feeling a bit maudlin and when I asked for an explanation, she described it as a bit "Eeyoreish". Not surprisingly, that was a word I could understand a little more clearly.
Me and my Eeyoreish friend :-)
Neither of us were fully satisfied with our definition so we raced to our respective homes to find a dictionary. My friend beat me to it - she's also beating me in online Scrabble at the moment. It turns out that maudlin means "foolishly tearful or sentimental, as when drunk
[from Middle English Maudelen Mary Magdalene, typically portrayed as a tearful penitent]"
This is a maudlin drunk
I got to wondering about the connection between the word and Mary Magdalene. I can understand that the word sounds ever so slightly like her name, but I was never aware that she was foolishly tearful while drunk. I've seen a few Booze Hags in my time (you know who you are!) and hadn't really pictured Mary as one of them.
This is apparantly Mary Magdalene and I don't think she's had a drop
So I wondered, if it wasn't the booze, what was Mary always weeping about? When I think of her, I think of a woman who had a bit of a chequered past. Someone who felt pretty icky about some of the things she'd done. Someone just like...ME. When I think of her meeting Jesus, and hearing Him tell her that she was okay by Him, I think I can picture her having a right snot fest at the wonder of someone so magnificent loving her just as she was. The art work we see of Mary Magdalene crying is a bit glamorous I think. She doesn't have puffy eyes or boogers dangling off the end of her nose. Her mascara doesn't even run. Mine does...
...I don't even look this pretty:
This is a Snot-Fest
I've decided that I quite like the way Mary Magdalene cries. Her tears remind me of forgiveness, being unconditionally loved no matter what, being able to love someone else (in her case, Jesus) so much that it makes you leak uncontrollably. I want to be able to love like that. Maybe feeling slightly maudlin once in a while isn't so bad - just stay away from the plonk.
Incidentally, during the course of our conversation I told my Eeyoreish friend my mother's middle names: Maud Ellen. She thought it was hillarious.
Zeeb is always up with the latest news and it’s usually bad. It was Zeeb who told me that Gary Coleman had died. She also told me about Michael Jackson, Heath Ledger and it was even Zeeb who was first with the news when Princess Diana had been killed. When she burst into my room over the weekend asking if I’d heard about our friends I was a little apprehensive. Thankfully her beaming face implied that something amazing had happened. Our friends, who had been childless for so many years, had adopted a 2 week old baby. We were over the moon for them. Even though this little one has Downs Syndrome, to his new mum and dad he’s just perfect. With all that love being poured out on him, this little guy has so much potential. He’s been a much longed for baby and Zeeb and I RAN to the car to get to the shops. We felt like the wise men shopping for baby Jesus.
Do you suppose there was as much excitement in Heaven when I was born? I would guess to the angels I seem disadvantaged: “Oooh, poor wee thing. She has no wings. She’ll never fly!” But I like to think that God took one look at me and declared that I was just what He wanted.
“I’ve been making this kid for 9 months and I planned her long before her parents even thought about being...”frolicsome”. As I grew up He might even have been thinking, “Gee I love how her hair frizzes at the ends and the way she’s so goofy. I love this kid of mine!”
Actually, I was a sickly youngster and one of the terrible side effects of my health was a bladder with a will of its own. At six years old I was belted by a harridan of a teacher and in front of 20 or so kids, I wet my pants in terror. Any self-confidence I may have been born with was dripping down my leg along with the wee and lying in a puddle at my feet. I wish someone could have told me that day what I now know: I am “fearfully and wonderfully made”.
I believe it’s the same for each of us. It’s Party Central in Heaven whenever someone turns to Jesus because each of us is special. Some babies aren’t planned. Some babies aren’t perfect in the eyes of others. But I’ll tell you something and you’d better listen up: God loves you just as you are. He loves you if you’re short, tall, ugly, pretty, gay, straight, dishonest, kind, black, white, pink or blue, or even if you’re standing in a puddle with pee running down your leg. Love is awesome but when I think about it with my human noggin, I don’t always like the people I love. “Like” means that I enjoy them, I want to be around them.
So right where you are today, God loves you, He thinks you’re lovely and he LIKES you
Have you ever wondered what you would wish for if you knew you could choose just one thing? I think about it sometimes and having gotten over the Alladin's Lamp Syndrome, I think I have it figured out. My biggest wish ever - and I hope this doesn't sound too corny - is to see Jesus smilingat me. Well, that and a Chicken Costume, but I could only choose one wish for the time being.
I just want to have that special look that says, "Hey Ange, I'm pleased with you. I've always loved you but as well as that, I want you to know that you make me smile because I like you."
Knowing that Jesus loves me is pretty academic. A lot of us are told that from songs we may have heard during childhood. Do you hear strains of "Jesus loves me..." running through your mind? But I think that knowing that He likes me is just that little bit more personal and special. We've all had times when we've been made to feel pretty crappy, especially when we were kids. Whether it was a put down from a teacher or the other kids mocking us. Experiences like that can really knock your confidence and have those doubts sneaking in about whether or not you're really worth anything. Since God sent Jesus, he must obviously think we're worth a lot more than we give ourselves credit for. I don't think Jesus would take any of it back. Even though I'm a dork and I stuff up on a daily basis, he still wants me to hang out with Him. So I think my wish might just come true because Jesus likes me this I know!
